A pastors perspective part 3

This week I’m sharing  with you some excerpts from an article I read last week from Christian week .  The writer describes, in a very relevant way, what your pastor (me included) is thinking.  Today I share with you the final three  … enjoy;

5. “I feel pretty insecure at times.” I have the only job I know of where, even if you are doing your job, people who don’t like you can vote to get rid of you. Imagine walking around feeling that not only is everyone in the community and congregation watching you, but as James 3:1 says, God is going to judge you more strictly than most people! That’s a tough row to hoe. I’m not insecure about my salvation, or God’s love for me, but I get a lot of feedback and it gets to me sometimes. I don’t know what it is, but people feel free to comment about and criticize everything from how I dress to how I parent my children, and everything in between. Everyone seems to know how to do my job better, and they’re not afraid to tell me. “Pastor, what we need is more _______ (outreach, hymns, new songs, prayer, fasting, potlucks, dieting, events, announcements, recycling, small groups, Bible studies, …).” “Pastor, we need to do less ________ (arguing, worrying, meetings, technology, eating, hymns, new songs, preaching, new stuff, old stuff, …).” You know when you sent me that email “to help me understand some things”? Well, I got 10 of those and four phone calls—on my day off.

6. “I don’t want to talk to you right before service.” Listen, I love you. I really do! I want to talk to you, hear about your life, your worries, cares, concerns and what God is doing to and through you, your family, your friends and even your pet Chihuahua. I carry a cell phone and publish my home number in the directory so you can get a hold of me anytime. I have office hours at church and make myself available for meetings in the evenings. I promise that I will be thrilled to chat about anything that is on your mind during any of the other 164 hours in the week. But PLEASE, for the love of Pete, let me have the time before service without a bunch of problems, conflicts and issues that I can’t possibly fix in the half-hour before service starts. Pray for me. Give me a pat on the shoulder say, “Love you, Pastor!” or throw out a hearty “Go get-em!” Ask me if there is anything you can do to help (or better yet, find some way to help withoutasking), or just give me a smile. Like an athlete before a big game, during that time, I’m trying to get in the zone and there is a lot of spiritual opposition working against me, and I need your help.

7. “I’m lonely.” Believe it or not, I don’t have a lot of friends. Sure, I talk to a lot of people, and care for them, and go to a lot of events and even have fun. But when it comes to having a real, tried-and-true, can say anything to guy-friend, I don’t have one. And if I’m like most pastors, then I probably don’t have family around either. I get along with people, but most folks don’t understand what I do or the struggles I go through. If I get vulnerable with the wrong person, they use it against me. Trust me, it’s happened before. So I guard myself, my ministry, my family, and yes, even you, from that fallout that can happen if I get double-crossed by someone who I thought was my friend. And the cost is that I’m very lonely. Your pastor is probably not the exception, even though he might hide it well. Pray for him. Take care of him. Cut him some slack and help him out. Being a pastor is a tough job and he needs your love, support, prayers, encouragements and willingness to stand up for him when the going gets tough.

A pastor perspective part 2

This week I’m sharing  with you some excerpts from an article I read last week from Christian week .  The writer describes, in a very relevant way, what your pastor (me included) is thinking.  Today is part 3 and 4 … enjoy;

3. “Sometimes I’m not very spiritual.” It’s true. There are days when I just don’t want to read the Bible, pray, meditate or do anything spiritual at all. I’d rather read the paper, watch TV, go for a walk, check my e-mail, get ready for a meeting or just sleep in. You’re not alone in your struggle to stay consistent in your daily Bible reading and prayer life. I’m right there with you. I just thought you should know that. Pray for me just as I’m praying for you.

4. “My job is not as cushy as it looks.” I know some of you fantasize about being pastors because you think it’s such an easy job. Buddy, you have no idea. I may not have much heavy lifting to do, but things do get pretty heavy sometimes. I have a passion for this church and this city and spend more hours thinking, praying, serving and weeping over them than I can remember. I have a heart for seeing people come to Jesus, but it always feels like our ministries are going uphill with a headwind. There are so many things I want to see done, but I can’t seem to get people to come with me to do them. You might be moved or convicted by one sermon every three months, but I am trying to let every one of them penetrate my heart, every week. On top of that, I have people call me out of the blue with every problem under the sun. They need money, a friend, a job, a place to live, protection from an abuser, freedom from an addiction or an answer from God (they think I can get it for them). And despite my efforts and prayers, I watch marriages and families break up right in front of me—and can’t do anything about it.

A pastors perspective

This week I’m going to share with you some excerpts from an article I read last week from Christian week .  The writer describes, in a very relevant way, what your pastor is thinking.  Some of his thoughts are dead on and some of his thoughts are a little off (I don’t like motorbikes or ‘malts’) and he writes in a “I’m trying to be cool but I’m not” sort of way at times (ie. dudes, chicks …) .  This will give you some insight into what pastors go through. Today – #1 and #2  Enjoy;

1. “I’m a guy, treat me like a guy.” Right off the bat I want you to know that I’m a dude like you, so stop treating me like a chick. I’m so sick of guys apologizing to me when they cuss, as though I might burst into tears or faint. Trust me, I’ve heard those words before…and yes, even used them. And you know what? I like guy stuff too! I don’t spend all my time sitting in my office, cross-legged with a Bible on my lap. I like cars, motorbikes, monster trucks, fishing, shooting, movies where things blow up and even the occasional malt beverage. And yes, I even struggle with all the same guy-issues you do. So, if half the reason you’re not talking to me is because you think we have nothing in common—you’re wrong.

2. “Often I have no idea what I’m doing.” Now, there’s something I’m not supposed to tell you. A big part of me wants to keep up the image that I have it all together, have a 10-year plan and every step I make is guided by God. But that’s just not true. I say dumb things, do foolish things and sometimes I’m so confused by my job that I don’t want to do anything because I’m scared I’ll make it worse. When I stood up and boldly proclaimed that new ministry idea, half of me thought it was a great plan and the other half was certain it would blow up in my face. That’s why I need you with me. I need some courageous, godly men to stand with me, not be afraid to make me defend my ideas. And then I need you to stand beside me when I inevitably throw the fertilizer into the ventilator and it all comes flying back at us.

Communication challenged

I learned a valuable lesson yesterday.   I had a very long day of preaching, visiting, counselling, talking and  praying for people -  essentially pouring everything I had into other people’s lives.   I was exhausted and all I wanted to do was lie on my bed, read a favorite book and veg.  Three chapters in and 9:30 at night, much to my surprise,  my cell phone rang.  It  happened to be a good friend of mine who was on a layover at the Calgary airport.  It was  short conversation, we didn’t answer life’s pressing questions – we just talked. 

What was the lesson I learned?  Sometimes a phone call or a face to face visit is exactly what we need.  My friend Mike didn’t rely on an e-mail or text to let me know he was around; he thought of me and he phoned.  What he didn’t know is that his phone call encouraged me immensly.  It encouraged me that he took the time to phone and that’s exactly what I needed. 

There are times that texting, facebook, twitter or e-mail are sufficient.  But sometimes what is needed is a phone call or a face to face meeting.  In our day and age of technology – don’t forget that personal contact is still appreciated.

A good wednesday afternoon distraction

I don’t claim to be a good singer.  I’m good at sleeping but not singing.  This guy made me laugh today

Fear of H1N1

I thought I’d dive into the hysteria that is the H1N1 flu.  I don’t want to get into the topic of whether to vaccinate or not (I think the threads from facebook have covered that) or whether it’s going to destroy the world as we know it (I think Chicken little that he has that covered).   From my perspective I see the H1N1 flu bringing something into the forefront that each and every single one of us deal with; FEAR. 

We fear what will happen to our children if they get the pandemic.

We fear what hill happen to us if we come down with this terrible flu.

The life we thought we’d live comes to a skreetching halt when we realize that we are all open to this deadly sickness. 

Fear overwhelms us, fear controls our emotions and fear sucks our joy like a mosquito sucks our blood.

Here are some great words from a favorite author of mine, Mark Batterson;

I think there are moments in life when we have to make major decisions that will determine our destiny.  And we will spend the rest of our lives managing those major decisions.  And if you let fear dictate your decision you’ll end up with a ton of inaction regrets at the end of your life.  Fear is a great friend, but it makes a terrible master!  Don’t let fear dictate your decisions.  You have to face your fears.  And what you’ll find is this; the thing that scares you to death is very often the thing that brings you to life.

 Fear is present when you think about H1N1 but it doesn’t have to preside over your life.  1 John 4:18  says “Perfect love drives out fear.”  In times where   you are fearful and uneasy about what the future holds – keep growing in your relationship with Christ and you will find out that it’s his love and care for you that will sustain you through fearful times.  A major theme in scripture is “do not fear”.  Take advantage of these words and know that there is a God who takes your fear and puts them on his shoulders so that you don’t have to. 

 

What I can’t believe

It’s been a while since I’ve blogged and some of you (paige) have let me know about it!  Today  I will give you a list of things that I can’t believe lately.

• how fast my kids have grown – I can joke with Caleb like I would with a teenager … and he is funny!  Abby has much better fashion taste than I do and she is starting to make up songs that actually rhyme  … and she’s good at it.  Hillary ate on a T.V. tray for the first time today … next she will be going on dates  
• how halloween crazy some people are – This might sound like a “back in my day” statement but it seems like people have gone crazy in regards to halloween and decorations lately.  When I was young we just walked around, rang doorbells and collected candy.  Nowadays everyone has blow-up ghosts on their front lawns, scary decorations on their door and a virtual haunted house inside.   
• that I pastor a church – I have to pinch myself regularly when i think that I have the responsibility of leading such an amazing church.  I can’t believe it (many people can’t believe it either – trust me, I get that response often).  I don’t ever take it for granted and want to do the best job I can do. 
• how much pressure I put on myself – here’s a glimpse into my life (I’m trying to be transparent here).  I put so much pressure on myself as a leader that it affects my sleep at times, affects how I relate to people and it stresses me out.    I want to be the best in whatever I do and it frustrates me when I don’t see it happening.  I have such encouraging people around me but there are times where I am my own worst enemy.   People ask me “what stresses you out” and i would probably say that the pressure I put on myself stresses me out the most!
• how much I enjoy listening to Jay-Z – I love his music even though I don’t love his lifestyle. 
• how much I love watching Extreme Home Makeover - Every single time I watch the show I cry.  Karen and I watched it last night and it inspired me in so many ways; creatively, emotionally and motivated me to act on what i believe – not just preach it.   It’s up there on my top ten list with Biggest Loser and Lost.

i’ve fallen and i can’t get up

I hate waking up early but I love being up early. The best time of the day is before the sun comes up, before the phone starts ringing and the emails start to fly.
The best part of the day is early but you can’t enjoy it unless you get out of bed. This is my problem – there are days where I miss the joy of the morning because I’m too comfortable in bed.
I like to compare this with my walk with god. I want to spend quality time with him but that means rolling out of bed, turning the tv off or stopping what I’m doing (usually snoring for me). It is when I actually get off my butt do I enjoy this incredible time.
I want to experience the “full life” that he offers but I can’t experience it if I’m too focused on my own comfort.
It’s only when we get out of the comfort then we can experience the gretest of the day

Happy birthday blog

Random Monday Thoughts;

• Happy birthday Blog – you’re two years old.  Two years of funny Abby stories, not-so-smart thoughts from me (brad) and general tom-foolery two or three times a week (for some reason I thought of Marc when I said “tom-foolery”.)  
• Over two years, the most read post is Pastors Kids. Google “pastors kids” and I’m #3?  Every week I get e-mails from people telling me their reflections on being a pastors kid and whether it was a good experience or a bad one.  It’s crazy how many terrible stories I hear – I think my kids will  need counselling   (Not because they are a pastors kid … just because of who their dad is!) 
• These past couple of weeks I’m really experiencing “sermon hangover” on mondays.  It’s a feeling like nothing I’ve ever felt like before.   It’s a mixture of tiredness, release and a feeling of “I should have done better”. 
• I spoke on “finances” yesterday and I’ve heard some great responses so far.  Some people have contacted me for some financial guidance (I’m not giving the guidance – I’m pointed them to people who can) and some people have talked to me about some decisions they have made.   I always feel weird talking about topics like this b/c I know I’m not a pro!  My prayer is always “LORD … HELP”. 
• My kids are taking me to Red Lobster tonight – I love Red Lobster.  (I have a funny feeling that I’ll be paying for the meal even though they are the ones doing the “taking”!
• If you attend MTC I’m assuming that if you came yesterday you realized how incredible of a guitar player Dwight is.  WOW the guy is incredible. 
• I’m slowly becoming a Calgary Flames fan.  It’s not that I haven’t been but I grew up watching the Canadians play and I have a special place in my heart for them.  I still have my Bob Gainey, Larry Robinson and Claude Lemieux posters … but karen won’t allow me to put them up in our bedroom.  If I could only find a poster of the greatest player of all time I would be happy … Bobby Smith. (for a non hockey fan you’d never heard of him … for a hockey fan … you probably don’t remember him)
• I’m sceptical of the new instant coffee from Starbucks.  “Instant” and “coffee” should never be in the same sentence. 

There you go – Have a great week.

You’re just weird

Do you have any habits or idiosyncrasies  that would make people think “you’re kind of weird?”?  * btw I think “idiosyncrasies” is the biggest word I’ve used this week … maybe this month.  On second thought – ever! *

Here are a couple of mine;

• When I navigate a website I always have to have the edge of my cursor arrow aligned with the edge of the page.  If I can’t do this I naturally find the side of a square and align it with that.  It drives me crazy when the cursor is sitting anywhere on the page.
• In my journal I have to use the same pen to write with.  There is nothing more annoying than flipping through pages of the past and see different colour writing – I’m not a 13 year old girl who likes to write each note using purple, pink, blue, red and greeen.  I’m strictly a black pen kind of guy.
• When I speak on stage I HAVE to have everysingle word written out in manuscript form.  If I don’t then I am secretly stressed out.  It makes the preperation process very long but it keeps me mostly on topic (I say mostly because there are times that I vear from my notes and say the dumbest things!)
• This may not be considered to be a habit or and idiosyncrasy (*I just wanted to use that word one more time)  but when I sit in a coffee shop I love listening to other peoples conversations.   It’s even crossed my mind  to buy one of those hearing aids for seniors that look like a bluetooth adaptor just to be able to listen more closely to what’s being said. 

There you have it.  I’d ask the question “what about you?” but since my mother is at my house and we don’t have access to our computer right now (It might have died) the only person reading this blog is computerless   O.K. I might be exxagerating b/c i know there are other people reading my blog but I really feel sorry for people who facebook questions on their status and nobody answers them!