As I’m fairly new at leading an organization so I thought I’d be a little vulnerable this morning and share with you some of the things that I’m learning lately. 

1.  There are times where anxiety gets the best of me.  Yesterday was one of those days – i felt a wave of stress hit me early in the morning and it didn’t leave until … I think it’s still there!  The weight of the churches finances, vision, direction, teaching, staffing , discipleship, assimilation etc … is a heavy one to bear at times.

2.  Sometimes the best leaders don’t feel qualified.  The past couple of months I’ve been trying to meet with older leaders who I can gain wisdom from and obtain practical advice.  These men are from other churches, businesses and leaders in their respective fields and I’m seeing a trend in most of our conversations; there are many times in a leaders life where they don’t know the answer, or don’t feel qualified but still have to take leadership.   There are many times where I pray to God “seriously God – help me out in this situation because I don’t feel like I know what I’m doing” and then I lead … because that’s what leaders do.

3.  I HATE it when people leave our church and I take it personally when they do.  I’ve been told, as a pastor, I was going to struggle with this and now I know exactly why.  It doesn’t matter how good you or your church is … people will leave.  It hurts me when a member of our church family decides to move on to somewhere else because I value every person and family that comes in our door.   The reasons for people vary; don’t like the time of service, don’t like the music, don’t like the pastor, don’t agree with the colour of the church …  no matter what the reason I take it personally.    That being said – even though some people go, we’re experiencing the joy of many others coming and experiencing God in a brand new way!  God is doing some amazing things in the lives of so many people at our church and it great to be a part of.  The people that have left are missing out – seriously. 

4.  Godly leadership starts with a Godly perspective.  MTC is His church and He will do with it as he wills.  I’m only a serveant to Him and to His people.  Where do i find my strength when I’m overwhelmed?  I go to Him.  Where do I go when I don’t know where to go?  I turn to Him.  He has been showing me, in an incredible way, that he is my Rock.

What was the book that got you passionate about reading?

Where was the place where God seemed to have spoken to you and you made a life changing decision?

Who has been the most influencial person in your professional developement?

What has been an accomplishment that you are proud of?

I have a whole list of questions like this that have been circulating through my tiny brain as of late.  Why? Because I would like to set up an area in my office where I can display an “altar” of sorts that remind me of God’s goodness and how he has work ed in my life in the past.   An altar where I can look over and see that God has done some incredible things in my life and wants to continue to do those things.  We all have times in our lives where we need to be reminded of some truths.  We all have times where we don’t “feel” what we think we’re suppose to “feel” and need to be reminded of what is true.  We all have times where loneliness and vulnerability might get the best of us and we need a reminder that we are not alone.  An altar is a chance for us to see visually how God has worked in our life.

Some of the objects that I’m thinking of; 

• a baseball glove that will remind me of my experience of an athlete growing up and how God used sports to mold and shape me into a leader, friend and teammate. 
• my used book  of a prayer for Owen Meany that started a passion within me to read.
• a toy VW beetle, or a helicopter  that will remind me of my great parents and how much of a blessing they have been to me.
• A school crest from Briercrest ; a place where God caught my attention and a place where God moved me into full time ministry
• A wedding photo to remind me of the gift that God gave me in Karen 

The list could go on and on and they might be some random things!.  Come to my office in the new year and you’ll see the complete set-up.

We all need reminders of God’s goodness and this is one way that I’m hoping I will continue to add to.

I mentioned on Sunday that in order to keep the “joy” in Christmas it would be beneficial to continue to be a kid again when it comes how you view life and Christmas.  Here are some ways that I’ve seen this in my own life as of late

• When i come home after a long day and the kids all yell “DADDY”.  That brings me such joy
• The amazing distinction that every snowflake is different. 
• The glow of lights off of the snow
• How incredibly delicious a Cinnamon Dolce Latte from Starbucks tastes (with whip)
• How a kind word can make someone’s day
• Sometimes all a child needs is a little gift … I think this transfers into adulthood
• The human body – if you watch The Biggest Loser you know how the human body can lose a huge amount of weight and, when focused, the human body can do incredible feats if it desires (like run a marathon after three months when you couldn’t even run a mile at the start … incredible)
• The heat (and beauty) from the fire in a fireplace – I love having all the lights off in the house and only the fire burning

MTC is sponsoring another Angel Tree this year.  The tree and it’s angels are a big part of blessing the socks families in our neighbourhood who are in need of food, clothing and a little encouragement.  People take an angel off the tree, purchase the item and place that item under the tree.  It’s fairly simple but incredibly impactful.

The gifts this year will go towards two families; a single mother from Kenya who has 4 children (they are refugee’s who have spent the past 5 years in a refugee camp who’s father was killed right in front of them) and a family of 6 who are expecting another baby any day.  What amazes me about both of these families is that when they were asked “what would you like for Christmas” they mentioned boots, pajamas, jeans and sweatshirts.  These are items that everyone in Canada should have (especially in this crazy weather) yet they have gone without.  They didn’t ask for Playstations or extravagent toys, they mentioned that their daughters wouldn’t mind, if it’s not too much of a problem, a barbie or a baby stroller.  That their boys like transformers and could use a soccer ball. They hesitated to ask for money for food and sleepers for their youngest. 

These families have come to Canada to find a better life and our church wants to help in providing that for them.  The bonus would be letting them know that Jesus loves them SO VERY MUCH. 

I can’t tell you how much my heart longs to help these families.  I can’t explain the joy I feel when I know that these gifts could literally save a life. 

I don’t know why I write this today?  I do want you to pray for these needy families that they might find a relationship with Jesus Christ.  I write this to let you know that there are incredible needs everywhere we go. I write this to challenge you, if you are part of MTC to be involved in this tree.  And maybe, if you’re not part of our church – you would want to be involved too?  If yes – go to www.mckenzietownechurch.com and donate some money through the site.  E-mail me that you’ve done that (bradm@mckenzietownechurch.com) and I’ll make sure that it goes towards these two families. 

Christmas time is a time to celebrate the ultimate gift of Jesus Christ.  We can celebrate that gift by being generous towards those who need it.   What a joy it is to be part of something like this

My children go to an incredible school.  Because it is a “christian” school they have some elements that incorporate “christian” ideas, philosophies and habits that will help them in their faith journey.  One habit that the school tries to develop in every student is the importance of having a regular quiet time with God; a time to read, pray and a time journal their thoughts in what they call a “quiet time journal”.   

This morning as Caleb was getting ready for school he started to discuss his enjoyement for writing in his “quiet time journal”.  How he found it “so easy” and that he enjoyed writing his thoughts on the page.  In the midst of the conversation I told him “Caleb – did you know that I have my own quiet time journal” (a journal I try to write in daily … notice I said “try”) and he said something that caught me by surprise; “dad, thanks for sharing that secret with me”. 

Wow, I didn’t know it was a secret but aparently it was.  In that moment I realized that something that I cherish so much, my quiet time with the Saviour, has been a secret to my children.  As parents we talk about our faith with our children and we make every attempt to connect life to our relationship with Jesus.   This moment, this conversation highlighted to me that my personal, private walk with my God, cannot be a secret to the children that God has entrusted to me.  

What does this look like and what does this mean?  I’m trying to process this but I thought that I would share this with you.  Why?  Because maybe your personal walk with God needs to be a secret no more with your children as well. 

Just some thougths on a monday morning

I have forgotten how enjoyable and exhausting it is being the parent of a two year old.  Hillary is almost there and is exhibiting some clever and not – so – cute tendancies of late.  

Take for instance her desire to never leave the house without a purse around her shoulder.  No matter where we go and who’s she’s with, the purse needs to come along.  The size and look of the purse is of no importance to her  (she does gravitate towards shorter straps) and it doesn’t matter who’s the rightful owner, her inate fashion flare must be accompanied with a purse. 

She also has a liking for hot drinks.  If you want a fun game to play when she’s in the room, try to drink a hot drink without her coming over and attempting to grab it out of your paws.  She cares not for cold drinks but float a mug in front of her mug and she’s grabbing it from you like a starving animal craving something liquid.   The worst experience is taking her to starbucks where travel mugs are aplenty and at eye level; I thought the barrista was going to kick us out because Hillary attempted to try out every mug she could get her hands on.  If you’ve purchased a starbucks travel mug in the past 30 days – hillary has probably licked it.

And finally her craving for mommies facial products.  I can probably say that everyday this month she has made an attempt to put on an assortment of eyeliner, blush, mascara and/or lipstick.  Yesterday I gave her a bath and had to wash off a face-full of lipstick with a mixture of blush and crayon.  We’ve tried to place the make-up high where she can’t reach it … but somewhere during the day she devices a plan to get it … which she does (i still don’t know how – I think she’s paying off Caleb to get it for her).  We’ve tried to hide the make-up but she is sneaky and follows her mom around the house until she needs it.  Karen puts it within reach and she pounces!   I think I heard her say “Maybeline” yesterday … but I’m not quiet sure?

It’s safe to say that one day you will see our daughter walking around with a purse in one hand, coffee in the other and some crazy make-up on her face … not when she’s older but maybe next week.

I know it’s a long title but that’s how I feel.   If I were pregnant I would have an excuse to be tired or if I was fighting some devestating disease that would be o.k. as well.  Unfortunately I can’t get pregnant and the only disease I’m fighting is “lazyietus” which is easily curable by a kick in the pants! 

For the sake of writing something I’ll let you know what’s got my attention lately;

• Tiger Woods.  He can golf and sell Buicks but like he said this week “I’m not perfect”.  It looks as if he’s been caught cheating on his wife and is trying to cover it up (I know, it’s not proven but if it smells like a fish, looks like a fish … it’s probably a fish).  I’m not too dissapointed b/c I rarely put too many people on a pedastal (other than Bobby Smith and Bill Weddington … you know they are the two best Canadian athletes ever to play the game of hockey and basketball!)
• Biggest Loser.  If you know me you know I follow the show religiously (usually drinking a 2 liter of Coke and eating a bag of chips!  Just joking).  Yesterdays show has almost motivated me to run a marathon.  If a guy who weighed the same as a small horse could run a marathon after excersizing for 4 months maybe I could … maybe.
• Global warming!  O.K. not really
• My friend Marc Vandersluys story about mice in his trailer. Marc  is going to seminary in Manitoba and he regularly makes me laugh … even when he’s not trying to be funny.  If you’ve ever had mice issues – you will laugh at what he’s going through right now.  
•  John Grisham’s book The Associate.  If I were to summarize my thoughts on this book it would be “AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”.  It’s almost as if someone told me they were going to make me a steak, let me smell it, allowed me to taste a portion then when I was ready to sink my teeth into it they quickly shoved a barbecued cow intenstine on my plate.  The Associate was an incredible read right up until the last 20 pages where the story fell flat on it’s face.  I don’t think I’ve been this dissapointed since … Oh Ya – the Riders Grey Cup Debacle this weekend.

There are my thoughts today.  Not very deep, I know.  You should be used to it already!

This week I’m sharing  with you some excerpts from an article I read last week from Christian week .  The writer describes, in a very relevant way, what your pastor (me included) is thinking.  Today I share with you the final three  … enjoy;

5. “I feel pretty insecure at times.” I have the only job I know of where, even if you are doing your job, people who don’t like you can vote to get rid of you. Imagine walking around feeling that not only is everyone in the community and congregation watching you, but as James 3:1 says, God is going to judge you more strictly than most people! That’s a tough row to hoe. I’m not insecure about my salvation, or God’s love for me, but I get a lot of feedback and it gets to me sometimes. I don’t know what it is, but people feel free to comment about and criticize everything from how I dress to how I parent my children, and everything in between. Everyone seems to know how to do my job better, and they’re not afraid to tell me. “Pastor, what we need is more _______ (outreach, hymns, new songs, prayer, fasting, potlucks, dieting, events, announcements, recycling, small groups, Bible studies, …).” “Pastor, we need to do less ________ (arguing, worrying, meetings, technology, eating, hymns, new songs, preaching, new stuff, old stuff, …).” You know when you sent me that email “to help me understand some things”? Well, I got 10 of those and four phone calls—on my day off.

6. “I don’t want to talk to you right before service.” Listen, I love you. I really do! I want to talk to you, hear about your life, your worries, cares, concerns and what God is doing to and through you, your family, your friends and even your pet Chihuahua. I carry a cell phone and publish my home number in the directory so you can get a hold of me anytime. I have office hours at church and make myself available for meetings in the evenings. I promise that I will be thrilled to chat about anything that is on your mind during any of the other 164 hours in the week. But PLEASE, for the love of Pete, let me have the time before service without a bunch of problems, conflicts and issues that I can’t possibly fix in the half-hour before service starts. Pray for me. Give me a pat on the shoulder say, “Love you, Pastor!” or throw out a hearty “Go get-em!” Ask me if there is anything you can do to help (or better yet, find some way to help withoutasking), or just give me a smile. Like an athlete before a big game, during that time, I’m trying to get in the zone and there is a lot of spiritual opposition working against me, and I need your help.

7. “I’m lonely.” Believe it or not, I don’t have a lot of friends. Sure, I talk to a lot of people, and care for them, and go to a lot of events and even have fun. But when it comes to having a real, tried-and-true, can say anything to guy-friend, I don’t have one. And if I’m like most pastors, then I probably don’t have family around either. I get along with people, but most folks don’t understand what I do or the struggles I go through. If I get vulnerable with the wrong person, they use it against me. Trust me, it’s happened before. So I guard myself, my ministry, my family, and yes, even you, from that fallout that can happen if I get double-crossed by someone who I thought was my friend. And the cost is that I’m very lonely. Your pastor is probably not the exception, even though he might hide it well. Pray for him. Take care of him. Cut him some slack and help him out. Being a pastor is a tough job and he needs your love, support, prayers, encouragements and willingness to stand up for him when the going gets tough.

This week I’m sharing  with you some excerpts from an article I read last week from Christian week .  The writer describes, in a very relevant way, what your pastor (me included) is thinking.  Today is part 3 and 4 … enjoy;

3. “Sometimes I’m not very spiritual.” It’s true. There are days when I just don’t want to read the Bible, pray, meditate or do anything spiritual at all. I’d rather read the paper, watch TV, go for a walk, check my e-mail, get ready for a meeting or just sleep in. You’re not alone in your struggle to stay consistent in your daily Bible reading and prayer life. I’m right there with you. I just thought you should know that. Pray for me just as I’m praying for you.

4. “My job is not as cushy as it looks.” I know some of you fantasize about being pastors because you think it’s such an easy job. Buddy, you have no idea. I may not have much heavy lifting to do, but things do get pretty heavy sometimes. I have a passion for this church and this city and spend more hours thinking, praying, serving and weeping over them than I can remember. I have a heart for seeing people come to Jesus, but it always feels like our ministries are going uphill with a headwind. There are so many things I want to see done, but I can’t seem to get people to come with me to do them. You might be moved or convicted by one sermon every three months, but I am trying to let every one of them penetrate my heart, every week. On top of that, I have people call me out of the blue with every problem under the sun. They need money, a friend, a job, a place to live, protection from an abuser, freedom from an addiction or an answer from God (they think I can get it for them). And despite my efforts and prayers, I watch marriages and families break up right in front of me—and can’t do anything about it.

This week I’m going to share with you some excerpts from an article I read last week from Christian week .  The writer describes, in a very relevant way, what your pastor is thinking.  Some of his thoughts are dead on and some of his thoughts are a little off (I don’t like motorbikes or ‘malts’) and he writes in a “I’m trying to be cool but I’m not” sort of way at times (ie. dudes, chicks …) .  This will give you some insight into what pastors go through. Today – #1 and #2  Enjoy;

1. “I’m a guy, treat me like a guy.” Right off the bat I want you to know that I’m a dude like you, so stop treating me like a chick. I’m so sick of guys apologizing to me when they cuss, as though I might burst into tears or faint. Trust me, I’ve heard those words before…and yes, even used them. And you know what? I like guy stuff too! I don’t spend all my time sitting in my office, cross-legged with a Bible on my lap. I like cars, motorbikes, monster trucks, fishing, shooting, movies where things blow up and even the occasional malt beverage. And yes, I even struggle with all the same guy-issues you do. So, if half the reason you’re not talking to me is because you think we have nothing in common—you’re wrong.

2. “Often I have no idea what I’m doing.” Now, there’s something I’m not supposed to tell you. A big part of me wants to keep up the image that I have it all together, have a 10-year plan and every step I make is guided by God. But that’s just not true. I say dumb things, do foolish things and sometimes I’m so confused by my job that I don’t want to do anything because I’m scared I’ll make it worse. When I stood up and boldly proclaimed that new ministry idea, half of me thought it was a great plan and the other half was certain it would blow up in my face. That’s why I need you with me. I need some courageous, godly men to stand with me, not be afraid to make me defend my ideas. And then I need you to stand beside me when I inevitably throw the fertilizer into the ventilator and it all comes flying back at us.